From the Mind of DER (Impossible/Impractical Christmas Gifts in the 1980s)

Christmas.
A time to be with one's family and friends. To reflect on the year that's passed. All the good and all the bad. While kids and adults sought proof and celebration in the existence of Santa/God alike...I look back on fond memories as a child surrounded by amazing toys.

Yes, it stemmed from a corporate cocaine influenced, money hungry special place but one cannot deny that being a kid in the 1980s meant "Best. Christmas. Ever." It meant spending all of December in deep worship with my bible, "The Sears Catalog".
This brings me to compile my list of "Top 5 Impossible and Impractical Christmas Toys in the 1980s".

Corey Taylor - XM@$

Further proof that Corey Taylor is a bad ass.


Not many Christmas songs can reference Christmas, Hanukkah, and Kwanzaa. Great song, great video, instant classic.

Hit the jump for a behind the scenes look at recording the song and Corey's description of the song (spoiler alert: he actually loves Christmas).

Gwaaaaar!

I went to high school in a very rural part of central Jersey, which is mostly inhabited with Upper Middle Class "Republican" types. However, the day after a Gwar show at City Gardens, I would see a surprising amount of "normal" kids with their faces stained red from the night before.  Long story short, Gwar has found a way to be relevant, funny and appealing to all kinds of insufferable human filth for 20+ years.

Deadbeat Gift Ideas

What do you get that deadbeat friend of yours that spends all day drinking beer and watching tv? How about a universal remote with a bottle opener attached to it?

"CLICKER" had their scientists working around the clock to create a universal remote that could control 8 devices, and (according to their website) open "brown, green, AND clear bottles".  It also says it will transform your "BOYCAVE" into a "MANCAVE"  (if you have a boycave, you're seriously fucked).

It should also come with a "Coping with Failure" manual and a voucher for "1 free bullet and gun rental" for your significant other.

You can buy it here for $24 after you've decided life isn't fun.

(posted by: Douger)

Season of Giving

23,000+ teddy bears were collected and given to local hospitals for children (hopefully none of the kids were suffering from frostbite when you handed them a frozen bear). This is a great model for charities to follow; create an opportunity for people to chuck their contribution at you.  Imagine if you could bury a couple quarters in a snowball and wing them at the Salvation Army Santa instead of putting money into that sad little pot.  The bell should only be rung if you hit him in the head or in the nuts.  If you make "giving" more violent/fun, more people would do it.


via BBC/IceCream Blog
(posted by Douger)